What's next

There were reasons why I wanted to keep my relationship with Rob on a the down low. It's not that I wanted to keep him a secret. Inside I was bursting with joy that I found someone who was just as into me as I was to them, but a part of me wasn't prepared for all of the questions and curiosity that ensues after you start dating someone....

"Is he the one?"
"Are you in love?"
"When is the wedding?"
"Ring by spring?"
"Are you going to move in together?"

Don't get me wrong, I touched that I am THAT loved and have the support in my corner hoping and praying that I find someone special, get married, and have a family. But can I just say "Halt!"?? We've been dating  for like a minute (actually 3 months). It's been 3 great months but at this stage, I have no intention of looking any farther into the future than what our plans are for the upcoming weekend. To some, I may be the oldest 30 year unwed, no kids bachelorette left. But for once in my life I feel truly happy and content with being where I'm at. For once I don't feel the need to compare myself to others or wishing my life were different. For once I have accepted my life as it is and have started to truly enjoy it.  Not to worry, I still see marriage and kids in my future. With Rob? I don't know. Perhaps.  But just like everything else I have experienced  in this relationship thus far, I'm taking it one step at a time. Enjoying the process. Enjoying the journey all the while continuing to learn and grow as a person.

I.Am.Happy.



Our Valentines Day at Benihana.



My Valentine

It's Valentine's week. Anyone who knows me, knows that this is my least favorite holiday let alone my least favorite time of the year. February tends to the coldest and snowiest time of the year. Gray days highly out number sunny days and I become super crabby and to be honest, lonely. This year it's different. I just got back from a wonderful vacation. Vitamin D has been absorbed into my skin and I no longer feel the need to be crabby at those yearly warm weather vacationers. But the most important reason is this year will be my first time, ever, having a Valentine. I have someone to snuggle with on the cold winter nights.  I know I am loved by my friends and family. I know that Valentine's Day isn't necessarily meant for just lovers, but the fact I have a special somebody to share this "Lovers" holiday with means a lot. I feel special. I feel like I'm a part of the club now.

I've been rather quiet about who I've been seeing the past few months. At first, I wasn't sure if the relationship was going to last. But... after some time and patience our relationship evolved to be something a bit more. It's true... I have a boyfriend. His name is Robert (Rob) and I like him very much. He's a good guy and a true gentleman. I'm still a little cautious and keeping my heart close to my chest but I'm happy. He's good to me and treats me well.

Valentine plans are pretty low key as he needs to work late that night. We still plan to get together to exchange cards (and probably some smooches) but we also opted to do something bigger together on Saturday night instead. A nice dinner and movie are probably in store. Rob's Birthday is in March so as a combined Valentine's/Birthday gift I bought us tickets to the Food & Wine Expo. He's kind of a foodie and loves wine and craft beers so it seemed like a no brainer. The event isn't until March 2nd though so we have some time until we get to enjoy that gift together. He's super excited, as am I. Anyone want to drop us off and pick us up so we can BOTH enjoy the event?! :)

I will leave you with some recent pictures of the two of us. Isn't he a cutie?! So huggable. I love his beautiful blue eyes and beyond envious of his LONG eye lashes. Wheee. Dating someone who's just as into you as you are him is fun. Excited to see what's in store for us.

Ice Castle at Mall of America 1/26/13




Firefighter Banquet 2/9/13

 

Aloha, Hawaii!

I'm back from paradise. Had an amazing time. I'm currently in the process of trying to figure out a way for me to move there and live permanently. I'm not kidding. I've never been so happy in my life than when I was there. Though it was just a vacation, I saw myself living there for life.

As we were descending into Honolulu, I had butterflies in my stomach. Not just from the turbulence but with the anticipation of what the next 10 days were going to bring. As they opened the door to the jet way, the intoxicating smell of rain and tropical flowers filled my senses. My friend greeted me in Hawaiian fashion with the most beautiful lei. I instantly felt at home.

My plan was to have no plans and just take each day as it came. My friend wasn't able to take as much time off as she hoped for but was gracious enough to offer me her car. Oahu is surprisingly easy to get around in. There didn't seem to be road rage either, in fact people are SO accommodating of merging  traffic. Not so much in Minneapolis. One thing I noticed about traffic is the speed limit is about 10 miles less there but people manage to go over by 15 mph. Go figure. I only got lost twice but thanks to GPS I found my way.

Here is how I spent my days in Hawaii:

Monday: It rained but still was a beautiful day. I went to Pearl Harbor. It was difficult to hear the stories and see pictures not to mention the remains of that horrific day. Went to Hickam Air Force Base and watched the sunset as the rain cleared out by the end of the day.

Tuesday: Went to Ko'Olina Lagoon in Kopolei which is about 30 minutes West of Honolulu. SO BEAUTIFUL. I laid out and soaked up the sun.

Wednesday: Went to the weekly Flea market at Aloha Stadium. It was your cheap Hawaiian trinket paradise. This is where I picked up a majority of my gifts for family and my boy. :) Spent the afternoon at the pool.

Thursday: My friend Amie was able to take one day off and she took me around the entire Island. I saw my first Whale Breach on this day too! Also experienced my first shaved ice. So yummy. We also visited Dole Plantation. Did you know that it takes 2 years for one Pineapple to grow?! Crazy. Went to North Shore scoped out all of the big surf beaches and even  saw Sea Turtles!! It was an awesome day!

Friday: Went back to Ko'Olina and beached it again.

Saturday: Went Whale watching. The best $60 I've ever spent. I saw about 20 breaches. The most incredible thing I've ever experienced.

Sunday: Toured the Island again. H3 Scenic drive. Went to Chinaman's Hat, Kualoa Ranch and hit up a Burger place on the way home. Fun fact is Kualoa ranch is where a TON of movies have been filmed (Jurassic Park, 50 first Dates etc...). Spent the afternoon at the pool again.

Monday: I was hoping to do a Shark Dive but it didn't work out. One thing about Hawaii is there isn't a sense of urgency when it comes to calling people back or confirming anything. It's a VERY laid back place. Hang Loose is a way of life. I was bummed about the shark dive but this just means I need to go back! I spent Monday back at North Shore and went to Waimea Falls. It was so lush, so green, so beautiful. It was a bit overcast this day with a few showers but still the surroundings were SO beautiful. We went back to Hickam Air Force Base and watched another sunset.

Tuesday: Went back to Ko'Olina for my last minute sun. I loved Ko'Olina and would recommend ANYONE to vacation at their resorts. Though pricey, it is so beautiful. The weather is perfect, everyday. That part of the Island has is very dessert like and has sun everyday and very few clouds. Plus the ocean is just so beautiful. Crashing waves and Mountains in the distance. Perfection. Tuesday night I was able to capture my first and only Rainbow. It was Hawaii's way to saying goodbye and to come back, soon!

It was wonderful trip. I saw everything I wanted to see and felt I had a true Hawaiian experience. I will be back to visit and if my dreams come true, to stay for good.

I took over 500 pictures. I edited them down to 220. Below are some of my favorite shots. Enjoy!

Hickam AFB Sunset

Hickam AFB Palm Trees with Sunset.

Ko'Olina Lagoons

Ko'Olina Lagoon. Have you seen a bluer blue? Sky or water?! Doesn't seem real but it was.

H3 Scenic Drive

Kualoa Ranch

My future home. Dream Big.

I saw about 20 Whale Breaches. AMAZING.

Waimea Falls. The trees were MASSIVE.

Waimea Falls. I promise you I'm happy here. My eyes are just squinty.



Rainbow!!



Raging Road

The story I'm about to share may sound a bit irrational. Even so, given our current state of our world and it's increasing impulse to inflict harm on others for no reason, I can't help but feel a little concerned for my safety and well being. For the record, I am OK. Just a little shook up.

I was on my way home from visiting my Man last night (Yes, it's official... we are bf/gf). It was about 10:30pm. I was tired and not feeling the greatest. I just wanted to get home and go to bed. I was going about 60 mph on a 55 mph highway. Out of nowhere a guy came zooming up behind me. He was riding my tail, so much so that I couldn't see his lights. I sped up and pulled into the other lane so he could pass me. As he passed me I looked over and raised my hands saying "What the Hell??!" He then proceeded to cut me off and slammed on his breaks several times. He then slowed down to 40 mph in hopes that I would pass him. I didn't. I just continued to drive in hopes he would just speed away. He didn't. He pulled over the shoulder to let me pass and then he started to follow me. I was nearing my exit home but decided that wasn't the wisest idea as I didn't want him to  know where I lived. He continued to follow me for 10 minutes and then eventually went away.

I finally made it home and was upset. I called R and told him what happened. He calmed me down but I still went to bed with knots in my stomach and only managed a few hours of restless sleep. I was worried that when the idiot was following me he managed to take down my License Plate info and would eventually look it up and track me down. Irrational thinking? Perhaps, but I can't help but be a little afraid. There are a lot of crazies out there who just want to inflict pain, worry, and chaos. Who's to say this asshole of a man couldn't be like any of the other crazies out there? Thankfully I'm dating a Firefighter and Law Enforcement student. He is very protective and I always feel safe when I am with him. Maybe this whole experience is even more reason to continue to spend more time with him. :) Trying to find the humor in the situation, but I still am a bit upset. This feeling will pass. Hopefully sooner rather than later. I don't like living my life in fear but today I still feel afraid.

Life update

Hi Friends! Sorry I've been MIA. Life has been busy, thankfully with mostly good things! Here is a little recap of what has been going on in my world.

1. Still seeing my not so mysterious man. We've had some good talks about what we are, and where we are heading. Taking it day by day and enjoying the time I do spend with him. He treats me well, very well. I'm not used to it but I'm learning to accept that this is how I should be treated. He makes me smile, laugh and all around feel good. I'm happy.

2. My 90 day challenge kind of took a nose dive. I'm really disappointed in myself. I could blame it on a slew of things. The Holiday's, dating someone new, stress at work but in all honesty I can only blame myself. I'm not going to give up on myself though. Once I return from Hawaii I plan to start the 90 day challenge again as I do believe it works, if I follow it. Will power! I know I have it hidden in me somewhere.

3. I leave for Hawaii in 11 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've been counting down since 130 days. To say I'm excited is a complete understatement. It's been FREEZING in Minnesota lately and next week they are saying highs in the 0's. WHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAATTTT?? Get me outta here already! I haven't taken a legit vacation, over a week, outside of Minnesota since 2004. I'm way overdue and if I can be selfish for a minute, DESERVE this time away. My plans are to enjoy the Island, take in some sights, and soak up as much sun as I possibly can! The friend that I am visiting told me a few weeks ago that it is Whale Season while I am there so we are hoping to do a Whale Tour! I'm also interested in doing a Shark Dive. Eeeeeeeeekkkkkk!!! So pumped!

4. Work has been INSANE. This shouldn't surprise me though. Whenever I try to take any sort of time off, the place suddenly can't exist without my presence and goes into freak out mode. I take this as compliment but also find it to be a huge pain in my ass, and also causes me to question if I should be taking time off at all. Ugh.

5. I visited my Grandma last weekend. She was feeling a bit down so I tried my best to cheer her up with flowers and lunch. We laid low and chatted while watching Animal Planet shows. I get my love for animals from her. It's genetic. As I was getting ready to leave I hugged her twice, told her I loved her and as I was walking out the door she said "I better hug you one more time as I'm not sure when I will see you again." Not sure why but this jolted my heart right into my mouth. It was a wake up call. God's way of saying "Make sure you tell the ones you love, you love them, always." So I hugged her again, a little tighter that time and went on my way.

Besides those few highlights, not much else to report. Hope to write more as things settle down. Thanks for checking in! Sorry I've been a bad blogger.