Life is complicated. Life is unfair. Sometimes it's so much easier to be negative then it is to be positive. A co-worker from work found out that she has Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer. She is 33 years old. What the #$%!. Even though I don't know Dayna on a personal level, she is a person. A human being. A young, beautiful, talented full of life girl, who is being robbed. Sometimes life just doesn't make sense. Sometimes I just look up and shake my head, trying so hard and desperately to see the good in this situation, to see God's plan when everything around me feels the opposite. Dayna has created a Caringbridge site to keep everyone informed on her status and progress. She has an incredible sense of humor, that right there will cure her. She openly has said that she is making Cancer her Bitch. Ha, I love it. That's right, girl. Cancer is your Bitch! You take control and fight this Bitch to the end, and win!
I don't know why I am letting this affect me so much. Like I said, I'm not close with her, just a mere acquaintance. It just hurts my heart. It hurts my heart that life can literally be taken away from you in a matter of seconds. It makes me sad to know that this could potentially happen to someone close to me and that very thought scares me. Scares me into making things right now. To live my life to the fullest NOW and live with no regrets. To make sure I call my parents, tell them I love them. To hug my friends and family a little tighter in saying good bye, because no one knows what tomorrow brings. To ask for forgiveness from those who I have done wrong to because why put it off one more day, when that release will set me free from guilt.
My head and my heart are at a very sensitive spot right now. I've reached an age when the reality of death, and even at a young age and the impact he has on ones soul, can be and is devastating. I gotta believe that there is a plan in all of this. That God is in control, even though it seems to be the opposite. I gotta believe in and do believe in miracles as they happen every, single day. So, to end this questioning life post, go home and tell your family you love them. Pick up that phone and apologize to someone you may have done wrong to. Hug and kiss your kids. Hold your husband/wife a little bit longer tonight. Make things right, now.
1 comment:
I know what you mean by letting it affect you. I still get teary-eyed when I think about or hear a story in our paper about the six that were killed in that accident in Cambridge a few weeks ago. I didn't know any of them at all. I just cried when I heard about it though. Life is definitely unfair and it is just so hard to make sense of it.
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