New Chapter

I had very mixed emotions surrounding Saturday’s big move. I was excited to start a new chapter, but also very scared. It was a very bittersweet day. As the movers were quickly moving my stuff out, I was thinking to myself “Wow, this is really it” and choked back some tears. Not sure why I was sad. I think it’s because a part of me still feels like I failed at my attempts of living the American Dream. Even though I know in the long run, walking away was the best thing for me, I still feel a sense of sadness that I can’t really explain. There were a lot of memories made at my place, and a lot of memories I wish I could erase. I have learned a lot about myself through this whole process and I have grown tremendously. I have proven to myself that I am a lot stronger then I give myself credit for. When I DO get through this, it will be even more proof that I can get through anything life decides to throw at me. This journey is far from over, in fact it’s really just the beginning. I’m sure there will be plenty more tears and frustration and nights awake worrying, but I have made the first step, the biggest step and have taken control of my life and my well being. You can’t really put a price tag on that, nor fault me for wanting a better life. This is my new American Dream. Jessica’s Dream for a better, safer, more secure life.