Hope Floats

As cliche as it sounds, life seems to only go by faster with each passing day, month, year. Let's reflect where I was a year ago:

1. I was in  the middle of my Condo madness. By this point I had lost my original buyer, and went through another 3 buyers. I was scared that the dreaded F word was going to happen but alas, buyer #4 found me and I FINALLY closed in August.

2. I started a new job as Director Admin. I went from supporting a team of 15 people to supporting a team of 150. Life was chaos, and still is. As much as I was ready for the new challenge, I was terrified. I struggled in my relationship with my new Boss and desperately missed the feeling  of being part of a team. After about 6 months, the ice finally melted between us, and 2 months later he announced his Retirement. Here I am today packing up his office and ensuring the last minute details are taken care of, and I'm actually a little sad that he is leaving. I learned huge lessons in being his Admin. I was pushed outside of my comfort zone. Learned to build a tough layer of skin and not show my emotions on my face (like I normally do). He was a good boss and he will be missed. My new Boss starts on Monday. I have every confidence that the transition with her will be seamless and flawless. She's personable, relateable, and friendly. All things I consider myself to be, so fingers crossed a  great working relationship will come about soon.

3. Remember P? Yeah, I haven't talked about him awhile. Well, a year ago we started talking. Went on our first date and thus began a whirlwind roller coaster romance. I fell hard for him and his daughter. There were red flags right from the beginning and those flags ultimately led to our breakup.  My heart was broken, again. A part of me thought that he could be the one, but you can't force someone to feel things they don't feel nor make them do things they don't want to do. I can look back at the relationship and be thankful for experience. I learned a lot about myself and even grew as a person. Though our break up wasn't ideal, the one thing he taught me was to never be sorry for how I feel. I haven't forgotten those words and often will catch myself when I start to apologize for things I don't need to be sorry for. I still think about him and his daugther. We've exchanged a few text messages in the past few months but nothing more. I am fairly certain he has a new girlfriend and I'm happy for him. I'm at peace with myself and let go of hurt I once felt. Now... there is E! Ironically we both showed up in each others lives around the time we were dealing with break ups. Though we are still just friends and the future is still unknown, I have every faith that only good things will blossom from this beautiful friendship. He says he doesn't read my blog but in the off chance that he IS reading this... You're pretty awesome, E. You make my heart go "Wheeeeeee" and bring so much sunshine to my life. Thank you for being you.

Life has a way of working out the way it's suppose too, doesn't it? Though there are ups and downs and all arounds, it's all a part of a plan that we can not control. All we are required to do is let go of the wheel and trust that our Captain will take us where we are destined to be. For once, I am excited to see what the next year will bring whereas before I was scared. The one word that still rings truth for me is Hope. I pride myself on that I've never lost hope in anything. I may be knocked down, kicked around but I always pick myself back up and keep pressing forward. Hope is always floating around my world and it will always remain to be so. Life is good. God is good.

Happy Friday!

Lesson Learned

I went to the Doctor a few weeks ago. I usually pay a $35 copay but during this visit, they didn't ask for anything. I figured I'd get a bill for $35 and that would be that. Well, I got the bill last night and I wanted to cry.

BAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRFFFFFFFFFFF. My 30 minute consultation in which NO blood tests, no exams, no nothing was performed cost me $201.57!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Apparently my Health insurance plan changed without my knowledge. I now need to meet a $250 deductible, and then it will be covered at 80%, while last year I would merely pay the co pay and it would be covered 100%. I wanted to (still do!) scream!!! A NOTHING Office visit costs $201 dollars. I guess it's just money... and apparently I am made of it. Lesson learned. I will never go to the doctor again unless I am on my death bed.

Da Lake

This is the lake. One of my most favorite places. I am very fortunate to have an Aunt and Uncle that invite me up every Summer.  It's not a cabin... it's a Lake Home and it's beautiful. I've been going here for 20 some years and it is by far one of the highlights of every summer.

It's a place to just be. No alarm clock. No agenda. Just eat, drink, and be merry. I much prefer falling asleep to the sound of Loons vs. hearing cars drive by on 169.


Smiley Jess is a Happy Jess.






The Lake is located just north of Brainerd in a tiny little touristy town called Nisswa. So tiny that if you blink, you miss it.



So peaceful



Simply Beautiful



Even though I love to get away every now and then... I pay for it majorly when I return with Lulu's wrath. Thankfully E was able to check in on the beast while I was away. She isn't known for the being the best host but fortunately this time, no blood was drawn and only a few hisses. I'm a packaged deal... you like me, you like my cat. E must like me huh? :)





I will stare at you until your bags are unpacked.





A little bit of Heaven

It's been a crazy week but the later part has been quite magical. E and I decided to go for a walk around Lake Harriet because it was such a beautiful day/night. Though E has lived in Minneapolis for almost 6 years, he has never visited Lake Harriet's Rose Gardens. I'm happy I was able to show him such a beautiful part of our great city. He seemed to really enjoy himself, and I was just happy to spend more time with him. Have I mentioned that he makes me heart smile? Well... he does. A lot. He even told me the other night that I do the same for him. Awwwwww. :)

This beautiful rose was called "Kiss Me." It would've been a perfect opportunity for me to ask E when he was planning on planting a big one on me, but I refrained. I'm learning patience in this whole situation and I am confident it will all pay off soon.

This marble stone tablet is at the exit of the rose gardens and it makes me smile. After a hectic week, I am choosing to only remember the sunny days. The past 2 days have been exceptionally sunny in more ways than one.















 We also walked through the Japanese Peace Gardens. It's just a romantical and peaceful place. The aroma intoxicates you.

I just love waterfalls. I could day dream here all day.

It was a pretty perfect night. Good company and conversation paired with some laughs and the makings of new memories. Life is good.

A whole lot of crazy

Work has been nuts. Boss is retiring in less than 2 weeks and I am trying to transition my new boss. On top of my everyday responsibilities, things have been just NUTS. Monday night, I felt like I ran a marathon and have been utterly exhausted ever since.

Family from out of town is here which means I will be heading up to the Lake this weekend. I was planning on taking Monday off from work, but now I'm thinking I should probably head back Sunday just because work is that crazy and there isn't another ME to take care of things while I take time off. Sometimes Life/Work balance doesn't exist.

I got the following text from E yesterday:

"Hope you had a wonderful day! :)"

That has been the highlight of my week so far. My day yesterday was not wonderful, but his text made me smile from ear to ear and truly made me feel better. It was his way of letting me know he was thinking about me. Be still my heart. We are planning to do something tonight and I am SO looking forward to it!

Dr. appointment last Friday went ok. In typical Doctor form, He was very vauge and mostly spoke in Doctor speak along with scribbling on paper what he "thought" was going on. I was given a prescription to hopefully help regulate some things and was told to start keeping a "Girl Journal." I'll go back in for more testing in a few months. I left the appointment still feeling very unsettled about things but have decided that it is out of my control and I have to let go, and let God.

It's only Wednesday. This makes me want to cry. I'm ready for Friday.

That's all for now. Hope to find time to write more later.