27. That I have been able to enjoy 27 Thanksgiving's together with my family
26. My job(s). I have 3 jobs that I absolutely love! I am so lucky and blessed!
25. Sharpies, pens, and sharpie pens
24. My Honda Civic 94,000 miles and still running like a champ!
23. Medicine (Drs.) I am confident that I will be in good hands on Friday morning when I go back in for another colposcopy.
22. Friends, unlike family, you are able to choose your friends and vice versa and they choose to be friends with you. What a comforting feeling
21. Family. Although you can't choose your family, there is a reason God chose your family to be your family. We put the FUN in Dysfunctional!
20. My home. Even though It has depreatiated it's value by 60% in the last 2 years, I am still a home owner and work damn hard to have my place!
19. I have a warm bed to sleep in every night
18. Luci(fer) my kitty. She is a little devil but still none the less, it is nice to come home to something that loves you unconditionally, provided you feed them.
17. Diet Coke
16. My mom. She has really shown me this last year what it means to be completely selfless and love a child unconditionally. Without her constant love and support these last 6 months I'd be lost.
15. The Office. It is my one show that I must watch every week. Laughter really does cure a broken and heavy heart.
14. Music. It's free therapy.
13. Summer Sun. I live for those 3 beautiful months!
12. Thunderstorms. More free Therapy. Wash away the icky and tomorrow is a new, brighter more beautiful day!
11. My Grandma. The most beautiful person I've ever or will ever know.
10. My Palm Pre. I now have internet access at home!
9. Hope. Without it, there is nothing to live for.
8. People.com and US weekly. It's smut but I love it.
7. Love. It is one the greatest and yet most complicated things that I have yet to figure out.
6. Chocolate. Need I say more?
5. El Loro Chicken Fajita's and Chips and while salsa. Ditto
4. Lip Stuff.
3. Cherry Passion Tic Tacs
2. Wine
1. Myself. I'm here for a reason, It's just taken me a long time to figure out the person I want to be.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
Frist weekend "Off" in awhile
This past weekend was my first weekend off from all of my jobs in over 2 months! I was excited of the idea of not having to run around taking care of animals or working for the City, but the freedom also left me a little panicked. I felt like I was missing or late for something.
Friday night I just hung low at home. Took a bath, read my latest InStyle magazine and went to bed early. Saturday my mom and I ran around and did some shopping. (She shopped, I was there for the ride) Saturday night I ended up going out with some friends to The Loop. I've heard good things about this place and overall, I had a good time. I did however miss the memo that you need to be 5'9, 110lbs and wear leggings with heals or boots with an oversized sweater or shirt paired with fashion scarf. Needless to say, I felt a little out of place and fat and ugly. Why are there some girls out there that seem their only sole purpose is to make us feel bad about ourselves? I did manage to enjoy a few glasses of wine but ended up leaving around 11:30 and called it a night.
Sunday I slept in a little bit and headed to Grandma's in Pine City. She is always so excited when someone comes to visit. We chatted about nothing in particular and had some lunch at the A&W. Everytime I see her now, she talks more and more about "When I'm not here anymore" and her latest thing is "I'm going to pre-pay my funeral, I want to be cremated." Everytime I leave her, I always get a surge of sadness and usually cry a little bit on the way home. I never know if that will be the last time I see her or talk to her. I always try to make the most of the time we spend together. She is my everything, my rock, my #1 cheerleader. The thought of not having her in my life truly makes me sick. She is 81 going on 82 but I still have a lot of hope that she has plenty of life left. I really just want her to see me get married and have my first baby. I better get on that huh?
Sunday night I stayed busy cleaning and doing laundry. My typical Sunday afternoon/evening chores. I took another bath and started to watch for the 10th millionith time the Sex and the City series. I had some more wine and a cupcake for dinner. Healthy!
I guess my weekend "Off" was filled with busyness. I'm kind of like the engergizer bunny... I just keep going and going. I think it may be time for a vacation. I can't truly relax and settle down unless I am away from the hustle and bustle of my life. Anyone have an extra $2000 they'd like to give me so I can go away somewhere?
Friday night I just hung low at home. Took a bath, read my latest InStyle magazine and went to bed early. Saturday my mom and I ran around and did some shopping. (She shopped, I was there for the ride) Saturday night I ended up going out with some friends to The Loop. I've heard good things about this place and overall, I had a good time. I did however miss the memo that you need to be 5'9, 110lbs and wear leggings with heals or boots with an oversized sweater or shirt paired with fashion scarf. Needless to say, I felt a little out of place and fat and ugly. Why are there some girls out there that seem their only sole purpose is to make us feel bad about ourselves? I did manage to enjoy a few glasses of wine but ended up leaving around 11:30 and called it a night.
Sunday I slept in a little bit and headed to Grandma's in Pine City. She is always so excited when someone comes to visit. We chatted about nothing in particular and had some lunch at the A&W. Everytime I see her now, she talks more and more about "When I'm not here anymore" and her latest thing is "I'm going to pre-pay my funeral, I want to be cremated." Everytime I leave her, I always get a surge of sadness and usually cry a little bit on the way home. I never know if that will be the last time I see her or talk to her. I always try to make the most of the time we spend together. She is my everything, my rock, my #1 cheerleader. The thought of not having her in my life truly makes me sick. She is 81 going on 82 but I still have a lot of hope that she has plenty of life left. I really just want her to see me get married and have my first baby. I better get on that huh?
Sunday night I stayed busy cleaning and doing laundry. My typical Sunday afternoon/evening chores. I took another bath and started to watch for the 10th millionith time the Sex and the City series. I had some more wine and a cupcake for dinner. Healthy!
I guess my weekend "Off" was filled with busyness. I'm kind of like the engergizer bunny... I just keep going and going. I think it may be time for a vacation. I can't truly relax and settle down unless I am away from the hustle and bustle of my life. Anyone have an extra $2000 they'd like to give me so I can go away somewhere?
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Bitter is the new Black
I don't know why I'm letting that D-bag of a guy who emailed me last week control my emotions. Ever since that little episode I've just been really bitter towards love and finding a special someone. I've convinced myself that there are no good guys out there and I will slowly turn into a crazy cat lady and die a lonely miserable life.
Like I've said a million times before (my apologies for being a broken record) but I just didn't picture that my life would be the way it is at this point. I honestly thought I would be married with a kid and I'm no where near any of those things. It makes me really sad to think that there is a possibility that it could never happen for me either. I did go out to dinner last night with a good friend Jessie(God bless her heart for listen to me bitch and complain) and she did cheer me up and make me feel like I am worth dating/marrying. Still... for whatever reason, I'm not feeling it. I've somehow got it imprinted on my brain that I'm un-marriable and maybe unlovable? It's crazy talk, I know but these are very real and honest thoughts I have from time to time and all too often, especially lately. It's hard to stay positive when time after time I strike out. How many frogs do I need to kiss (or get a nasty email from) before my imperfectly perfect Prince finds me or vice versa? How does one go about finding a true love anymore?
Anyways... I've decided that this being bitter thing really isn't a good look on me so I'm going to try, REALLY REALLY hard to be more positive. Supposedly when you are positive, that will attract positive things? Hmmmm we shall see. So I will leave you all with 5 things that are great about me to kick start my positivity.
1. I'm a good person
2. I have a good heart
3. I'm caring
4. I'm loving
5. I'm a freakin' catch!
Like I've said a million times before (my apologies for being a broken record) but I just didn't picture that my life would be the way it is at this point. I honestly thought I would be married with a kid and I'm no where near any of those things. It makes me really sad to think that there is a possibility that it could never happen for me either. I did go out to dinner last night with a good friend Jessie(God bless her heart for listen to me bitch and complain) and she did cheer me up and make me feel like I am worth dating/marrying. Still... for whatever reason, I'm not feeling it. I've somehow got it imprinted on my brain that I'm un-marriable and maybe unlovable? It's crazy talk, I know but these are very real and honest thoughts I have from time to time and all too often, especially lately. It's hard to stay positive when time after time I strike out. How many frogs do I need to kiss (or get a nasty email from) before my imperfectly perfect Prince finds me or vice versa? How does one go about finding a true love anymore?
Anyways... I've decided that this being bitter thing really isn't a good look on me so I'm going to try, REALLY REALLY hard to be more positive. Supposedly when you are positive, that will attract positive things? Hmmmm we shall see. So I will leave you all with 5 things that are great about me to kick start my positivity.
1. I'm a good person
2. I have a good heart
3. I'm caring
4. I'm loving
5. I'm a freakin' catch!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
And this is why I should give up dating...
As of this morning, I closed my Plenty of Fish account all because of this email I received from another fish:
"Hi... your friend in one of your pictures is hot, is she single?"
It's hard to remain positive about dating and finding a good guy when you get an upsetting email like this. I hate complaining about being single and how much I wish I could find a great guy, fall in love and get married but damn it... I'm ready!!! I've been ready for a long time now and the older I'm getting, the more panicked I am that it's not going to happen.
I just needed to vent. Tonight I will be getting a McDonald's Supersize Big Mac Meal, Chocolate Malt, and sit around and feel sorry for myself. Tomorrow will be a new day, a better day, and hopefully Mr. Right will go ahead and find me already.
"Hi... your friend in one of your pictures is hot, is she single?"
It's hard to remain positive about dating and finding a good guy when you get an upsetting email like this. I hate complaining about being single and how much I wish I could find a great guy, fall in love and get married but damn it... I'm ready!!! I've been ready for a long time now and the older I'm getting, the more panicked I am that it's not going to happen.
I just needed to vent. Tonight I will be getting a McDonald's Supersize Big Mac Meal, Chocolate Malt, and sit around and feel sorry for myself. Tomorrow will be a new day, a better day, and hopefully Mr. Right will go ahead and find me already.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
I love my job!!
My boss nominated me for an award at work today!! Below is her write up and a picture of my award! I love my job, I love my boss! I am so lucky to have a job let alone one that I love and enjoy and actually WANT to come to work everyday!!
Apparel & Accessories PD&D would like to recognize JESSICA SPARLING with the award for EXECUTION & ORGANIZING.
One of the many reasons Jessica has become the “go to” person for NIT Design is her awesome organization. Not only does she keep the TEAM organized by being proactive and getting meetings out on their calendars well in advance, she also has shown a real “can-do” attitude by volunteering to help with many different things such as keeping the trend library in order, and assisting with color palette organization and trend board construction. Our Art Team has had to utilize many freelance designers, and Jessica has been in charge of keeping track of all of the contractors and monitoring that budget. Jess is a real asset to NIT Design, and we all love the sense of community she brings to our team! Congratulations, Jessica!
Apparel & Accessories PD&D would like to recognize JESSICA SPARLING with the award for EXECUTION & ORGANIZING.
One of the many reasons Jessica has become the “go to” person for NIT Design is her awesome organization. Not only does she keep the TEAM organized by being proactive and getting meetings out on their calendars well in advance, she also has shown a real “can-do” attitude by volunteering to help with many different things such as keeping the trend library in order, and assisting with color palette organization and trend board construction. Our Art Team has had to utilize many freelance designers, and Jessica has been in charge of keeping track of all of the contractors and monitoring that budget. Jess is a real asset to NIT Design, and we all love the sense of community she brings to our team! Congratulations, Jessica!
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