Do you have an Ex that just wont go away, no matter how much you try to cut them out of your life? I'm lucky enough to have one and yesterday I found out some disgusting news. But to bring you up to speed in case you dont know what I am talking about... catch up here and here
I heard from him again yesterday afternoon except for this time this is what he had to tell me:
"I just wanted to let you know in case you find out on Facebook that I got married last weekend."
My first thoughts were... no way. All he did when we were together was lie, he couldn't possibly be telling the truth. But... I did some creeping I mean "Research" and sure enough, he DID get married. The more I thought about it, the more upset I got. I could honestly care 2 sh**s about him, but what really got me upset was the fact that he was trying to get me upset. He was trying to hurt me again because apparently he didn't hurt me enough last year. My mind was flooded with all sorts of emotions. The only way I could release was through tears.
What disturbs me more than anything is the last time I heard from him was back in July (right around the time I met P). He sent a text that said
"I just was thinking about you, missing you, hope you are well."
Come to find out, he was engaged at that time. WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU CONTACT ME IF YOU ARE ENGAGED TO SOMEONE ELSE??? I don't get it. I don't understand. I know I shouldn't care, but it angers me that he still is trying to hurt me even after a year has passed.
P called me on my way home from work last night and he could tell something was wrong. I didn't want to tell him what had happened in fear that he may think I still have feelings for the ex. He managed to get it out of me and like a little girl, I cried to him on the phone. We weren't planning on seeing each other last night, but he quickly decided that he was going to come up to see me and cheer me up. By the time he arrived at my place, I had settled down, but was still pretty emotionally drained. We went out to dinner and talked about things again. He assured me that my reaction and feelings were valid, normal, and completely human. He also said (In the most loving way he could)
"Jess, you are so much better than this sh**... don't let him win.Let it go. You are way better off and way happier now."
He was right. He IS right.
My past is in the past and it will stay there, forever. I am hopeful for my future and what is in store. And more than anything, I am so happy with my present. Break downs need to happen so you can re-build. I was broken down yesterday but thankfully, P was there to build me back up. God bless his heart.
2 comments:
P is just fantastic. So glad he is there. As far as the past guy, it only verifies that you do not want to be with someone who while in a relationship, is so untrustworthy and shady. I don't have faith they have this great relationship to get married so quickly - she obviously doesn't know him or is just as effed up as he is = these kind of people DO get married to each other. It's scary. And they produce effed up kids - I see them all the time. ;)
It seems so long ago but the same thing happened to me in a different way the day after Marty and I became official. My ex called who I dated for a year and a half to "get back together". After I hung up, I cried. I wasn't sure why. I was over him. It just made me upset all over again. Mart was witness and I felt bad because I didn't want Marty to think I still had feelings for him.
Take it as a sign that our guys are two great guys because they didn't flinch or bat an eye at it. They were supportive all the way.
My oh my...your ex has issues.
It sounds like he's measuring his self worth on how much pain he can inflict.
He is so unhappy and disconnected that he is projecting it on to anyone who might be experiencing happiness.
He realizes the mistake he made and now he knows there is no repairing it.
P is smart.
P is blessed, because you are a blessing to all who come in contact with you!
I know, I speak from experience!!!
Biz
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